Listen, I know you’re thinking I wish I was home with Cherie and her fabulous cooking. I mean, really, she’s just like the best cook ever…just thinking about her burnt taco shells just makes my mouth ache with desire…or just ache. Side note, they were edible and consumed and this is a regularly occurring episode in my kitchen when I’m the chef.

Yes, my maid prefers to drink wine and watch Netflix, but she finally broke down and cleaned the house. And yes, I am the maid. I’m also the flower bed gardener. And once again, I’ve been preferring to drink wine and watch Netflix, but this has been going on too long, specifically azaleas growing taller than my 5’8″ self, too long. So the last couple of days, I got out there and just chopped and chopped. I made a huge pile of clippings. Sorry, neighbors. The tops of my forearms are soar, but the azaleas are now waist high and it looks like people actually reside at my house instead of it being vacant with overgrown bushes. And I’m definitely done for a while, as not fifteen minutes after I picked up my last big pile of debris beside the water hose, here slithers up a yard long speckled black snake. Now before you tell me how good speckled black snakes are, I need to remind you that: a. I was just bending down grubbing my bare hands under piles of leaves and sticks right there. b. I was wearing shorts and sandals. c. I’m terrified of snakes, even the good ones. Soooo…seriously done out in the azaleas. They might be higher than the house, unless Mr. Snake moves along.

Other interesting wildlife notes, we’ve had two really big hawks out in our neighborhood lately. In fact, I was taking a break on the rocker on the porch when a squirrel scampered like it was running for its life just within reach of me, as he darted across the porch. I’m assuming from the hawk that was nearby. Also, our red headed woodpecker has brought his baby to the bird feeder this week and it’s so cute. Our neighbors also report a raccoon, which I think has been coming by drinking our hummingbird food at night. I think she’s having someone come relocate it. It’s been a Disney wildlife menagerie.

Below is the finished product of the siege on the hedge.